Download and read online Dick and Dom's Big Fat and Very Silly Joke Book in PDF and EPUB
Download and read online Dick and Dom s Big Fat and Very Silly Joke Book in PDF and EPUB Dick and Dom are pan-generational household names who have been delighting television audiences for well over a decade. Dick and Dom’s Big Fat and Very Silly Joke Book is a hilarious mishmash of Dick and Dom’s very own bonkers yet brilliant breed of humour. Feast your eyes on over five hundred brilliant gags, japes, jokes and puns; be amazed at Dick and Dom’s Titbits, a selection of fascinating yet fact-free facts; settle in to Dick and Dom’s Poetry Corner for some slightly naughty but very silly poems, and never be bored again with Dick and Dom’s brilliantly baffling Boredom Busters. Most importantly of all, laugh until you do a Vom Goblin.* (*A burp with a small surprise serving of sick. See their first book, Dick and Dom’s Slightly Naughty but Very Silly Words, for more details!) With hilarious illustrations on every page, you’re bound to find something to tickle your funny-bone! Who is old, wise and green all over? Bogey-Wan Kenobi
Download and read online Dick and Dom s Christmas Jokes Nuts and Stuffing in PDF and EPUB It's time to get festive with Dick and Dom, esteemed TV geniuses and authors of the bestselling Dick and Dom's Big Fat and Very Silly Joke Book - with Dick and Dom's Christmas Jokes, Nuts and Stuffing! A fantastic compendium of Christmas jokes and activities, crazy carols, completely true Christmas facts* and all-round festive nuttiness - Dick and Dom's Christmas Jokes, Nuts and Stuffing! is the perfect stocking filler for kids of all ages. *This is a lie - we made them up because we're anarchists!
Download and read online Dick and Dom s Slightly Naughty but Very Silly Words in PDF and EPUB Dick and Dom are pan-generational household names who have been delighting television audiences for well over a decade. Dick and Dom's Slightly Naughty But Very Silly Words! is a collection of their brilliant made-up words and phrases. Filled with the silliest words and definitions imaginable, and illustrated with glorious line drawings, this is a hilarious book to come back to again and again. Dobbawoofsinit: A person who has trumped and blamed the dog. Germ Rain: The little bits of spit that some teachers do when they're talking. Musty Troutwarbler: An aged teacher who can't keep control of the class.
Download and read online Dick and Dom s Whoopee Book of Practical Jokes in PDF and EPUB Meet Dick and Dom, TV legends, creators of Slightly Naughty But Very Silly Words and authors of the *world's best Big Fat and Very Silly Joke Book! But now it's time for . . . (drum roll please) . . . Dick and Dom's Batty Book of Practical Jokes and Mischief! Packed with rip-roaring jokes, supremely silly songs, hilarious practical puns and brain-bustlingly brilliant activities - if this book doesn't tickle your funny bone, you're probably dead! *In our opinion. Other opinions are available.
Download and read online Penguin Pocket Jokes in PDF and EPUB Have you heard the one about the man who walked into a bar? (Ouch!)... Penguin Pocket Jokes is essential (and hilarious) reading for anyone searching for the perfect joke. Whether you want a snappy wisecrack or a longer rib-tickler when making a speech, this easy-to-use guide will provide the perfect witticism.
Download and read online Why We Suck in PDF and EPUB The New York Times bestseller One of America’s most original and biting comic satirists, Denis Leary takes on all the poseurs, politicians, and pop culture icons who have sucked in public for far too long. Sparing no one, Leary zeroes in on the ridiculous wherever he finds it—his Irish Catholic upbringing, the folly of celebrity, the pressures of family life, and the great hypocrisy of politics—with the same bright, savage, and profane insight he brought to his critically acclaimed one-man shows No Cure for CancerLock ’n Load. Proudly Irish-American, defiantly working class, with a reserve of compassion for the underdog and the overlooked, Leary delivers blistering diatribes that are both penetrating social commentary with no holds barred and laugh-out-loud funny. As always, Leary’s impassioned comic perspective in Why We Suck is right on target. Leary is the star and co-creator of the Emmy-nominated television show Rescue Me.
Download and read online Bridget Jones s Diary in PDF and EPUB With an introduction by Caitlin Moran A dazzling urban satire of modern relationships? An ironic, tragic insight into the demise of the nuclear family? Or the confused ramblings of a pissed thirty-something? As Bridget documents her struggles through the social minefield of her thirties and tries to weigh up the eternal question (Daniel Cleaver or Mark Darcy?), she turns for support to four indispensable friends: Shazzer, Jude, Tom and a bottle of chardonnay. Bridget Jones's Diary was first published in 1996 and applauded by critics from Salman Rushdie to Jilly Cooper. A number-one bestseller, Helen Fielding's book has sold over fifteen million copies worldwide and has been turned into an Academy Award-nominated film series starring Renee Zellweger, Colin Firth and Hugh Grant. Bridget Jones's Diary is followed by Bridget Jones: The Edge of Reason and Bridget Jones: Mad About the Boy.
Download and read online Surely You re Joking Mr Feynman in PDF and EPUB Winner of the Nobel Prize for Physics in 1965, Richard Feynman was one of the world's greatest theoretical physicists, but he was also a man who fell, often jumped, into adventure. An artist, safecracker, practical joker and storyteller, Feynman's life was a series of combustible combinations made possible by his unique mixture of high intelligence, unquenchable curiosity and eternal scepticism. Over a period of years, Feynman's conversations with his friend Ralph Leighton were first taped and then set down as they appear here, little changed from their spoken form, giving a wise, funny, passionate and totally honest self-portrait of one of the greatest men of our age.
Download and read online Absurdistan in PDF and EPUB Meet Misha Vainberg, aka Snack Daddy, a 325-pound disaster of a human being, son of the 1,238th-richest man in Russia and proud holder of a degree in multicultural studies from Accidental College, USA. Misha is an American impounded in a Russian's body and the only place he feels at home is New York; he just wants to live in the South Bronx with his Latina girlfriend, but after his gangster father murders an Oklahoma businessman in Russia, all hopes of a US visa are lost. Salvation lies in the tiny oil-rich nation of Absurdistan (a fictional former Soviet republic), where a crooked consular officer will sell Misha a Belgian passport. But after a civil war breaks out between two competing ethnic groups and a local warlord installs hapless Misha as minister of multicultural affairs, our hero soon finds himself covered in oil, fighting for his life, falling in love, and trying to figure out if a normal life is still possible in the twenty-first century.
Download and read online True Story in PDF and EPUB Five struggling stand-up comedians search for fame and fortune in the comedy clubs of the 1980s
Download and read online Dirty Jokes and Beer in PDF and EPUB The star of "The Drew Carey Show" presents a collection of vignettes based on the people and places he encountered on the way to fame and speaks back to his show's critics
Download and read online Yiddish with Dick and Jane in PDF and EPUB Jane is in real estate. Today is Saturday. Jane has an open house. She must schlep the Open House signs to the car. See Jane schlep. Schlep, Jane. Schlep. Schlep, schlep, schlep. In text that captures the unque rhythms of the original Dick and Jane readers, and in 35 all-new illustrations, a story unfolds in which Dick and Jane--hero and heroine of the classic books for children that generations of Americans have used when learning to read--manage to express shades of feeling and nuances of meaning that ordinary English just can't deliver. How? By speaking Yiddish, employing terms that convey an attitude--part plucky self-assertion, part ironic fatalism. When Dick schmoozes, when Jane kvetches, when their children fress noodles at a Chinese restaurant, the clash of cultures produces genuine hilarity.
Download and read online Dietland in PDF and EPUB A Best Book of the Year Entertainment Weekly • Bustle • Amazon • Women’s National Book Association • Kirkus Reviews • BookPage • Kobo • LitReactor “Audacious and gutsy and heartbreaking — Dietland completely blew me away.” — Jennifer Weiner The diet revolution is here. And it’s armed. Plum Kettle does her best not to be noticed, because when you’re fat, to be noticed is to be judged. With her job answering fan mail for a teen magazine, she is biding her time until her weight-loss surgery. But when a mysterious woman in colorful tights and combat boots begins following her, Plum falls down a rabbit hole into the world of Calliope House — an underground community of women who reject society’s rules — and is forced to confront the real costs of becoming “beautiful.” At the same time, a guerilla group begins terrorizing a world that mistreats women, and Plum becomes entangled in a sinister plot. The consequences are explosive. “A giddy revenge fantasy that will shake up your thinking and burrow under your skin” (Entertainment Weekly), Dietland takes on the beauty industry, gender inequality, and our weight-loss obsession — with fists flying.
Download and read online Double Down in PDF and EPUB Michiko Kakutani, The New York Times: "Those hungry for political news will read Double Down for the scooplets and insidery glimpses it serves up about the two campaigns, and the clues it offers about the positioning already going on among Republicans and Democrats for 2016 ... The book testifies to its authors’ energetic legwork and insider access... creating a novelistic narrative that provides a you-are-there immediacy... They succeed in taking readers interested in the backstabbing and backstage maneuvering of the 2012 campaign behind the curtains, providing a tactile... sense of what it looked like from the inside." In their runaway bestseller Game Change, Mark Halperin and John Heilemann captured the full drama of Barack Obama’s improbable, dazzling victory over the Clintons, John McCain, and Sarah Palin. With the same masterly reporting, unparalleled access, and narrative skill, Double Down picks up the story in the Oval Office, where the president is beset by crises both inherited and unforeseen—facing defiance from his political foes, disenchantment from the voters, disdain from the nation’s powerful money machers, and dysfunction within the West Wing. As 2012 looms, leaders of the Republican Party, salivating over Obama’s political fragility, see a chance to wrest back control of the White House—and the country. So how did the Republicans screw it up? How did Obama survive the onslaught of super PACs and defy the predictions of a one-term presidency? Double Down follows the gaudy carnival of GOP contenders—ambitious and flawed, famous and infamous, charismatic and cartoonish—as Mitt Romney, the straitlaced, can-do, gaffe-prone multimillionaire from Massachusetts, scraped and scratched his way to the nomination. Double Down exposes blunders, scuffles, and machinations far beyond the klieg lights of the campaign trail: Obama storming out of a White House meeting with his high command after accusing them of betrayal. Romney’s mind-set as he made his controversial “47 percent” comments. The real reasons New Jersey governor Chris Christie was never going to be Mitt’s running mate. The intervention held by the president’s staff to rescue their boss from political self-destruction. The way the tense détente between Obama and Bill Clinton morphed into political gold. And the answer to one of the campaign’s great mysteries—how did Clint Eastwood end up performing Dada dinner theater at the Republican convention? In Double Down, Mark Halperin and John Heilemann take the reader into back rooms and closed-door meetings, laying bare the secret history of the 2012 campaign for a panoramic account of an election that was as hard fought as it was lastingly consequential.
Download and read online Too Fat to Fish in PDF and EPUB Outrageous, raw, and painfully funny true stories straight from the life of the actor, comedian, and much-loved cast member of The Howard Stern Show—with a foreword by Howard Stern. When Artie Lange joined the permanent cast of The Howard Stern Show in 2001, it was possibly the greatest thing ever to happen in the Stern universe, second only to the show’s move to the wild, uncensored frontier of satellite radio. Lange provided what Stern had yet to find all in the same place: a wit quick enough to keep pace with his own, a pathetic self-image to dwarf his own, a personal history both heartbreaking and hilarious, and an ingrained sense of self-sabotage that continually keeps things interesting. A natural storyteller with a bottomless pit of material, Lange grew up in a close-knit, working-class Italian family in Union, New Jersey, a maniacal Yankees fan who pursued the two things his father said he was cut out for—sports and comedy. Tragically, Artie Lange Sr. never saw the truth in that prediction: He became a quadriplegic in an accident when Artie was eighteen and died soon after. But as with every trial in his life, from his drug addiction to his obesity to his fights with his mother, Artie mines the humor, pathos, and humanity in these events and turns them into comedy classics. True fans of the Stern Show will find Artie gold in these pages: hilarious tales that couldn’t have happened to anyone else. There are stories from his days driving a Jersey cab, working as a longshoreman in Port Newark, and navigating the dark circuit of stand-up comedy. There are outrageous episodes from the frenzied heights of his coked-up days at MADtv, surprisingly moving stories from his childhood, and an account of his recent U.S.O. tour that is equally stirring and irreverent. But also in this volume are stories Artie’s never told before, including some that he deemed too revealing for radio. Wild, shocking, and drop-dead hilarious, TOO FAT TO FISH is Artie Lange giving everything he’s got to give. And like a true pro, the man never disappoints.